Ah, yes. Judging. Let’s face it. We all do it. Whether we are judging someone else, a situation, or – most commonly – ourselves, it’s an unavoidable trait of human nature.
Judging makes us feel safe. It makes us feel important and closer with others, such as when we gossip (although separating us from others at the same time). Our mind uses judgment as a way to comprehend and respond to the world. Our mind is finite and super uncomfortable with the infinite possibilities of the world in which we live. So, it builds a reference point – or “box” – around what is “right” and anything that doesn’t fit is wrong. And from the point, we judge.
But, the problem with judging is that it separates us from possibility and it separates us from love.
In other words, it does more damage to our own wellbeing and goal-crushing abilities than we realize. The safety, importance, and camaraderie we feel from judgment is fleeting. However, it is also addicting.
You can ride the high of feeling safe, important, and connected for a short while, but when it wears off, you are left feeling exposed. Instead of confronting the root cause, it’s easier to stuff that thing back under the surface and take another puff of the judgment drug.
Breaking the cycle is no easy task, but it is one of the most freeing, rewarding things I’ve ever done.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m far from perfect and still working on this just as much as the next person. But stepping into that uncharted territory of determining why I’m judging, and directing my energy towards that instead, takes a lot of weight off my shoulders. And if the trouble within is too daunting, there is no shame in reaching out for help from a professional or someone you trust. Love yourself enough to ask for help, my friend.
In today’s blog video, inspired by the amazing Gabby Bernstein, I share what happens when we judge (physically, emotionally, energetically) and how we can begin to reign it in. Who knows, perhaps together we can start a movement towards a judge-free, love-only world!
Releasing the grip from my judgments has helped to keep the past from holding me back, while working on my mindset has helped to propel me forward. The mindset mini course I created can help you with the latter. I walk through the 5 steps I took to stop self-sabotaging and take strides toward achieving my goals. It’s currently available for anyone to access, but not for long! Subscribe to the free course here.